Expectations/should systems

Individuals often have expectations about how others should think, feel and behave. Yes it is important to have standards for yourself and even others the problem occurs when people allow the behavior of others to cause stress or negativity in their lives. It is not productive to allow other peoples thoughts, feelings or behavior to cause you stress. It is productive and healthy to decide what you want to do in response or in reaction to others thoughts, feelings, or behavior.

So if you want to be healthier, there are a few things you can do. You can either gain a better understanding of why people are thinking, feeling, or behaving as they are when it does not meet your expectations, and often with more knowledge you will probably be less stressed. You could change your expectations. You can plan on being proactive and taking positive productive action in response to whatever is causing you stress. Or you can choose to not allow yourself to get stressed about things you cannot change, just accept it! You actually have lots of options rather than just being stressed! You must develop skills for having appropriate expectations.